Handsome Jack - Hero of Pandora (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
thedifferencebetween) wrote2015-07-15 05:54 am
thedifferencebetween) wrote2015-07-15 05:54 am
Entry tags:
Pokemon Teams and Roster
Starter: Meowth
Name: 'Oh God Damn It'/'Cattrap/'Get The Hell Away From Me'.
Gender: Probably a dude (M)
Level: 47
What It Can Do: Scratch, Growl, Bite, Fake-out, Fury Swipes, Screech, Faint Attack, Payday
Notes: Thinks it's a cat. Is actually a failed abomination that I can't get rid of. Sheds on everything. Listens, eager for praise. Poops money. Arguably more pros than cons.
Type: Trubbish
Name: It has no name, it's a pile of garbage.
Gender: Pile. Of. Garbage. (F)
Level: 18
What It Can Do: Not Leave Me Alone, Poison Gas, Pound, Recycle
Notes: HOW DOES IT KEEP GETTING BACK INSIDE???
Type: Doom Bone Dog. Also known as 'Houndour' -> Houndoom
Name: Doom Boner
Gender: Definitely a dude! (M)
Level 28
What It Can Do:
Notes: Don't steal scary looking puppies from little kids, this is what you'll get. An organic doorstop that slobbers on you. Update: Holy dickballs he finally evolved and now I have a monster. Mistakes were made.
Type Skiddo -> Gogoat
Name Ass-Gore
Gender ????? How do you sex magic goats? (f)
Level 53
What It Can Do: Tackle, Growth, Vine Whip, Tail Whip, Leech Seed, Razor Leaf, Worry Seed, Synthesis, Take Down
Notes:
Type Tentacruel
Name Jellyfish?
Gender I don't know, it's a jellyfish. (M)
Level: 59
What it can do: Poison sting, Supersonic, Constrict, Acid, Toxic Spikes, water pulse, Wrap, Bubble Beam, Acid Spray, Barrier
Notes Almost ate it. Good thing I didn't, since it's full of poison!
Type Spearow
Name 'Bloodwing'
Gender I hope it's a girl. (F)
Level 47
What It Can Do Peck, growl, leer, Fury Attack, Pursuit, Aerial Race
Notes Holy shit, it looks just like a mini version of Mordecai's stupid bird! I know what I'm calling it...
Name ????
Gender ???? (F)
Level 8
What It Can Do Scratch, Leer, Covet
Notes DO NOT TOUCH THE EARS! Seriously. Leave its ears alone.
Type Pachirisu
Name 'Sparky'
Gender M
Level 62
What It Can Do Growl, Bite, Quick Attack, Charm, Spark, Endure, Nuzzle, Swift, Electro Ball, Sweet Kiss
Notes This one apparently never gets any cooler looking. Boo.
Type Skorupi - > Drapion
Name I dunno, something cool.
Gender Badass (f)
Level 65
What It Can Do Bite, Poison Sting, Leer, Knock Off, Pin Missile, Accupressure, Pursuit, Bug Bite, Poison Fang, Venoshock
Notes Tork? Looks like a tork. Evolves into the unholy offpsring of a tork and a bullymong. Can't tell if that's the worst idea or the best.
Type; Magikarp
I'll fill in the rest when it evolves, since it doesn't matter until then.
Type: Charmander (Shiny) - > Charmeleon -> Charizard
Name: I'm thinking...Warrior
Gender: M
Level: 68
What It Can Do: Scratch, Growl, ember, Smokescreen
Notes: So this cute little guy's gonna grow up to be a giant purple and black dragon that spits lava. And he's the rare kind. Score!
Type: Glameow -> Purugly
Name: Zarpedumb
Gender: Female
Level: 67
What It Can Do: Fakeout, Scratch, Growl, Hypnosis, Feint Attack, Fury Swipes, Charm, Assist
Notes: Bitchy, fickle, and gonna be huge and purple and dumb looking. Hence the name. Update: Oh. My. God. She's even dumber looking and fatter than I thought she'd be, this is great! Kicks ass, though.
Type: Beedrill
Name: Kill Sting
Gender: I don't care (M)
Level: 65
What It Can do: Fury Attack, Focus Energy
Notes: Poisonous. Seriously. So poisonous. I can't really stress how poisonous this thing is. Do not let the stinger near you.
Type: Ponyta -> Rapidash
Name: Aethon
Level: 49
What It Can Do:
Notes: Magic firehorse. Friggin awesome. Bought one for me, one for Manaka. Gonna get three more and a chariot.
Type: Nidoking
Name:
Gender: M
Level: 85
What It Can Do:
Notes: Used to be Kaz's. Kinda miss that dude. Left me with some goodies, though. This guy's badass and loves to beat the crap out of everything.
Type: Haxorus (Shiny)
Name: Shinryu?
Gender: M
Level: 69
What It Can Do:
Notes: Kaz's other parting gift. Awesome level, great moves...gonna compete with Doom Boner over 'Pokemon I Most Often Have To Take to The Center Because Something's Stuck In His Mouth'. Keeps getting stuck in the doggy door. I think it's stupid. FML.
Type: Whirlipede -> Scolipede
Name: Spinny Spinny Death Death, I don't care.
Gender: You couldn't pay me to try and find out (F)
Level: 68
What It Can Do:
Notes: Swiped this one off some old lady who was having breakfast at a cafe. Didn't seem to care when I grabbed it. The pokemon, not the old lady. She's probably crying and wailing somewhere, all sad... but her fault for leaving her killer bug thing outside. Since it's another poison bug, I kept it for myself.
Type: Ursaring
Name: Goliath
Gender: Male
Level: 59
What it can do: Hammer arm, Covet, Scratch, Fury Swipes, Feint Attack, Slash
Notes: Caught this one skiing! Not...not literally, I wasn't on skis when I caught it. But I was on a ski trip! Found out there was badass bears around, so I caught one. I'm gonna teach it to box and see if Felix'll fight it.
Type: Houndoom
Name: Havoc
Gender: Male
Level: 100
What it can do: DESTROY SHIT, HOLY NUTBALLS! (Inferno, Thunder Fang, Leer, Ember, Howl, Bite, Fire Fang.)
Notes: Once upon a time, I saw a dude having trouble with a mean-ass Houndour on the network, so I tried to get him to fight it himself 'cause I was bored. Except that worked, and the dude and I became friends, and now he's gone and this asshole's mine and I think it hates me. The only reason I can even let him out is 'cause I got a badge now. Updates Finally worked shit out with this dude. Can't let strangers into the house when he's out, though, he'll try and eat them.
Type: Paras -> Parasect
Name: Trippy
Gender: Female
Level: 42
What It Can Do: Cross Poison, Scratch, Stun Spore, Poison Powder, Absorb, Fury Cutter, Slash
Notes: I dunno, it's a mushroom. It's got poison spores. Seems like something I oughtta have so I caught one. Kinda creeps me out since it evolved. Didn't get me high but I reached a new level of intimacy with my toilet that night.
Type: Porygon
Name: 133t[)(_)(|<69
Gender: A complex series of 1s and 0s probably
Level: 30
What It Can Do:
Notes: Why didn't anyone tell me about these things before? Where can I get like twenty more of them?
Type: Munna
Name: MILLEFEUILLE but I can't pronounce that so I call her Milli Vanilli
Gender: Female
Level:93
What It Can Do: Psywave, Defense Curl, Lucky Chant, Yawn, Psybeam, Imprison, Moonlight, Hypnosis, Zen Headbutt, Synchronoise, Nightmare, Future Sight, Calm Mind, Psychic, Dream Eater, Telekinesis, Stored Power, Dazzling Gleam
Notes: Freaks me the hell out but used to be Manaka's so I can't get rid of it. Wish it wouldn't sit on me while I sleep, I think it's trying to suck out my soul.
Type: Rockruff
Name: 'Fudge' but I'm gonna change that - F-Word
Gender: I forget (M)
Level: 10
What It Can Do:
Notes: Replacement for Doom Boner when the asshole grew up and stopped being cute. Gift from Diana. Kinda cute little guy, D.B hates him. Updates Yeah, okay, he's pretty decent. Likes to sleep in the bed. Not sure he can tell me and Felix apart, though...
Type: Furfrou, Debutante Cut
Name The Great and Powerful Miss Taylor Swift
Gender: Female
Level: 15
What It Can Do
Notes: Diana sent me and Felix dogs, 'cause apparently we're that cliche of the rich married gay dudes. But this one's great, I never really wanted a foofy dog but look at her! If Taylor Swift was a Pokemon, she'd be this Pokemon. I was meant to have this dog.
Type: Poochyena
Name: Doxxi
Gender: Female
Level: 10
What It Can Do:
Notes: Another dog from Diana. How did I end up with so many freaking dogs? Anyway, this little bitch...she's gonna be a good fighter. Cuddles up to the other ones, then just turns around and slashes'em when she's bored or whatever. Obviously I had to name her after Moxxi. But she's a dog, so she's Dog Moxxi. Plus 'doxy' means mistress, and I didn't even think of that till after! I'm awesome even when I'm not trying!
Violet Gym Badge Team
Charmeleon, level 38. Scratch, Growl, Ember, Smokescreen,
Pachirisu, level 42. Bite, Quick Attack, Charm, Spark
Tentacruel, level 36. Poison sting, Supersonic, Constrict, Acid
Purugly, level 48. Fakeout, Scratch, Growl, Hypnosis, Feint Attack, Fury Swipes
Meowth, level 30. Scratch, Growl, Bite, Fake-out, Fury Swipes.
Havoc
Name: Havoc
Gender: Male
Level: 100
What it can do: DESTROY SHIT, HOLY NUTBALLS! (Inferno, Thunder Fang, Leer, Ember, Howl, Bite, Fire Fang.)
Notes: Once upon a time, I saw a dude having trouble with a mean-ass Houndour on the network, so I tried to get him to fight it himself 'cause I was bored. Except that worked, and the dude and I became friends, and now he's gone and this asshole's mine and I think it hates me. The only reason I can even let him out is 'cause I got a badge now. Updates Finally worked shit out with this dude. Can't let strangers into the house when he's out, though, he'll try and eat them.
Doxxi
Name: Doxxi
Gender: Female
Level: 10
What It Can Do:
Notes: Another dog from Diana. How did I end up with so many freaking dogs? Anyway, this little bitch...she's gonna be a good fighter. Cuddles up to the other ones, then just turns around and slashes'em when she's bored or whatever. Obviously I had to name her after Moxxi. But she's a dog, so she's Dog Moxxi. Plus 'doxy' means mistress, and I didn't even think of that till after! I'm awesome even when I'm not trying!
D.B.
Name: Doom Boner
Gender: Definitely a dude! (M)
Level 28
What It Can Do:
Disrupt Local Planets With His Gravitational Field, Drool On Everything...Leer, Ember, HowlNotes: Don't steal scary looking puppies from little kids, this is what you'll get. An organic doorstop that slobbers on you. Update: Holy dickballs he finally evolved and now I have a monster. Mistakes were made.