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Handsome Jack - Hero of Pandora ([personal profile] thedifferencebetween) wrote2017-10-03 09:42 am
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WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, HANDSOME JACK.

FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 021.07.222.57

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ikonsuit: <user name="ikonsuit"> (𝒅𝒔 + stand down)

[personal profile] ikonsuit 2021-01-12 12:56 am (UTC)(link)
[ It sounds like a lot happened in the Before Times. Like before Slade got here. Taako doesn't sounds like a real name, either, but Jack is humming some song and Slade loses interest in pondering the complexities of dual-wielded dicks. ]

What is that? Hey. Knock it off. [ Tolerance for cheery machine music is zero, apparently! If Slade is the one having his body intruded upon, he at least gets to chose the playlist. And this ain't it. ] You don't have a radio down here?

And I couldn't tell you.

Didn't come with an instruction manual. 'S probably something important.

[ Yes, now is the time for second thoughts. ]
thedifferencebetween: (you wanna make a deal?)

[personal profile] thedifferencebetween 2021-01-12 01:12 am (UTC)(link)
You got a good looking mainframe...oh sweet holy fuck, it's the earworm. Once it's in....

[Jack shakes his head as though he could dislodge it. There's a reason he had wiped its existence from Claptrap's library, but it lives on inside his head. And a number of local novelty covers.]

No radio, I got my music player. Pick your awesome lady crooner of the golden age! Which is the late twentieth and early twenty first century. If ya like Taylor Swift - which everybody should - I got ya covered!

[Okay, Jack needs a few more things in this case. He ducks down to rummage through his bag and coming up with a syringe and a vial.]

Plus...I been backwards engineering shit since I was kid, I'll figure out how you work. Might get a liiiiitle uncomfy, but you're a big boy, you can handle it!
ikonsuit: <user name="ikonsuit"> (𝒅𝒔 + showdown)

[personal profile] ikonsuit 2021-01-12 01:40 am (UTC)(link)
[ He's not a Taylor Swift fan β€” by extension; she was after his time, and Rose's goth phases never dipped into Taylor Swift territory β€” but that doesn't sound like the thing to say to a T-Swizzle loving diva who's five seconds away from having a screwdriver in your chest. ]

You got... [ Time for an old man to rack his brain for post-80s music. ] Lady Gaga?

Disclaimer's fine, but you can't shake me, Jack. Take notes and try not to fuck anything up.
thedifferencebetween: (this is my sad face)

[personal profile] thedifferencebetween 2021-01-12 03:14 am (UTC)(link)
I got Gaga! And don't say that till you've had the actual physical experience of someone messing with your bits.

[It's a whole different ballgame. But Jack puts on Bad Romance and nods to himself before getting to work. First things first, a sample of that fluid that Slade's got running through him!]

But do me a favor and keep up the convo while I'm doing this. That way I'll know immediately if I do something that fucks with you super bad! Cuz I might fuck you up, I dunno what the hell kinda bot you are or how you work. Here we go!

[With no other warning, he plunges the syringe into Slade's synthetic tube-veins to extract some liquid.]
ikonsuit: <user name="ikonsuit"> (𝒅𝒔 + staff)

[personal profile] ikonsuit 2021-01-12 04:08 am (UTC)(link)
Not my first rodeo.

[ Slade wasn't planning on sharing just how familiar he is with strange experimentation, but Jack asks him to keep a conversation going, and that's not something he can say no to. Literally. If Jack checks, Slade's latest directive says as much, TALK TO JACK. ]

Took up with the Armed Forces before I learned to sign my name in cursive. I was good. They fast-tracked me to a beta-tested super-soldier programβ€” [ Oh, that's a needle in his tit, all right. The liquid flows with a viscosity similar to water. It's not like his face can move in a way indicative of a wince, but there's a chance he wouldn't flinch even if this wasn't the case. He broke his own arm, once, to escape from a trap. He's fine. ]

Strapped to a table for days. Pumped full of chemicals. Think I died once or twice, if I recall correctly.
thedifferencebetween: (hiya cupcake)

[personal profile] thedifferencebetween 2021-01-12 04:18 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah but that was with a human's capacity for pain.

[Still, impressive, and worth making a note of. Definitely good info to have on the guy.]

Which is pretty damn finite, actually! Like me. I can take a beating, I'm pretty tough, and I come from a place where human life has literally no value. None. Like...negative value, basically. Everybody's always killing everybody cuz there's no laws against it in most places. And I had the particular luxury of growing up during a double military occupation! Two corporations were fighting for my planet, and fuck any civilians just trying to live their lives....Not that there was much life to live on Tantalus.

[Jack transfers the sample and seals it, setting it aside for the moment.]

But depending on your processor and how your body transmits info, you might feel shit you've never imagined a system can feel! On the other hand, it goes both ways. Awesome stuff can feel extra awesome - sim on sim sex is the best friggin sex I've had! Okay, keep talking, we're gonna interrupt this liquid flow here and see what happens!

[No fancy tools, he just reaches in to squeeze shut the most important looking tube. Science!]
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