Handsome Jack - Hero of Pandora (
thedifferencebetween) wrote2017-10-03 09:42 am
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those ppl r bugfuck nutso!
no im not a moron geeze
i just keep grabbing a beer or lighting a cigarette & then i remember i dont have a mouth anymore
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They really are. Like, why no love for the sims? You're telling me no one wants to trade in skin for circuits? I don't believe it. It was never my thing, but I know it was yours- and I knew at least three people back home with the same end goal in mind.
Give your beers and cigarettes to me. I could smoke them and blow it at you- wait a minute, can you smell things? I can't believe I've never asked you that before.
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its cuz they come from this backwoods, technology dark ages place
they dont get how awesome robots r
yea u can have em
not really
not like human ppl smell things but im aware of odors
its info i pick up on but its not like i smell things
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So don't bother with perfume on dates with Jack, check.
[The next message takes awhile to come through.]
Speaking of... we kind of- made some plans, back when we were human. Something about a date? And I already got a dress for it and everything, so... if you still wanted to go out sometime, you know, that'd be cool.
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but im at my wits end istg
hey why not? traditional dinner is out, obvs, but how about i take ya dancing? ya like 2 go dancing?
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I love dancing. That sounds like a blast. When? Where? Should I meet you?
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i just dont kno wut 2 do ill figure it out
ok cool!
but i guess that depends
this our usual buds hanging out kinda deal or r we gonna do it up old school style like a real date?
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[There's a long pause before the next message comes through; and when it does, it doesn't immediately answer the question.]
You're not going to disappear on me, are you Jack? Only a lot of people have, lately. Slade- Fenris- Rafe. I barely had time to invite myself to move in- now it's just me, a teenage girl, five dogs and a lion.
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look u kno i cant totally & 100% make that promise
but i can say ive ben here a REALLY long time
multiple years
ive never poofed & come back
ive ben rite here since i first woke up in this kooky dimension
but i get it
i made & lost the best friggin friend i ever had in my life here
but statistically speaking im a pretty safe bet
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Human us... they seemed like they had a good thing going, you know? It wasn't weird or anything. And it's been ages since I've been on a real Date date. What about you?
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ill b honest with u
human me was real happy being ur casual bf
i dont think it wud suck if we took a page outta their book & gave it a try
plus were super hot & awesome together & dating doesnt mean we gotta stop fooling around with other ppl or anything
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Reasons like what Angel let spill, trying to turn Harley on him. Like what Tim dropped here and there, that made Harley think Jack might've been a little bit of a- well- dictator? Back home. But most of all how easy it was, to be close to Jack. How he was funny and charming and amazing fun and definitely a looker, but could flip that switch that screamed 'Dangerous' without breaking his stride. How confident he was- and yeah, okay, maybe there was some narcissism in there, but- who didn't have their little quirks? More than once, they'd been laughing or making out or just chilling together- and Harley'd catch a glimpse of his face and think Oh, girl, this one's a slippery slope. You could fall so easy into that.
But- this wasn't any kind of falling. The thing they'd had when they were human- it was casual. And it was nice. And it wasn't like they were going to get serious, just- maybe introducing a little romance. Nothing wrong with that... right?
Harley realizes she's still staring at the screen, and has been for who knows how long, without sending a response.]
I think I'd like that.
I mean I did like it, obviously, just- me now, with you now. You know what I mean. Someone really needs to invent some tenses for a past that didn't really happen except in the ways that it did.
But just- still keeping it casual, just with a little bit extra.
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we both been burned we both got our shit
but its also pretty friggin dumb 2 ignore the fact were into each other 4 reasons beyond how hot & gud at sex we r
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Christ, we really did hit it off from like the literal first minute, huh? Best advertisement for dead people disposal turned booty call I've ever had.
So... maybe we give it a shot. See how it goes.
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we did
we got sumthing babe
werent looking 4 it werent planning on it but its there
i say we do! come on wuts really gonna change?
we hang out all the time
we sleep together
we share feelings & emotion shit with each other
so we do sum more couple-y activities & i get u more 'just cuz' presents
big deal!
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And you're right. You and me, we fit together like puzzle pieces. Which is a kind of wild all on its own, because we're both, shall we say, ~unique individuals~.
So we'll do it. Wanna be my casual boyfriend, baby?
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its the kind of crazy cool shit that happens 2 ppl like us! ive always been that guy
ive always been real lucky
i bet u have been 2
u kno i do babe
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And all of this so say... are you picking me up? You got a spot in mind?
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a fancy place uptown
doesnt get 2 many monsters but i dont think u mind being the center of attention
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Tonight? I'm crashing at Rafe's old place, these days- you know where it is? Come grab me, and I'll be your uptown girl for the evening.
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drop me an addy i dont kno where anybody lives besides u & the ppl who live with me
ill c u soon
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An hour later finds Harley on the front porch of the big house, kicking idly in a porch swing with a cigarette in one hand. As promised, she's wearing a dress- a full, floofy blue skirt with yellow petticoats doesn't quite hit her knees, and the top is yellow silk across her chest that ties up in a halter. Somehow, she's figured out how to curl fiber-optic hair; it tumbles over her bare shoulders in softly glowing ringlets.
(Where are her cigarettes? Where is her anything? She isn't carrying a purse.)
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He does eventually pull up in a low riding black sportscar with no top. The no top look was apparently really popular. Weird, but in a world where there aren't people constantly shooting at you, probably not a big priority. And it's a sexy car, a rich guy's car...what else is he gonna pick Harley up in? He's promised her a stylish night on the town, and he plans to deliver. They got a lot to celebrate, and he's looking forward to a night of not stewing over things he apparently can't change. She always puts him in a good mood.
"Hey there, pretty lady, that's a good color on you. Wanna ride?"
One eye flashes a bit brighter than the other, Jack's equivalent of a wink. God she looks good. He's in black, a tailored suit jacket and slacks paired with a grey silk shirt unbuttoned half way - for once not sporting his yellow Hyperion jersey. It's a fancy night, after all.
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"Hey Handsome. Nice wheels! Hmmm, depends; what's it going to cost me?"
It's a convertible, so she doesn't bother with opening the door; sitting on the edge, she brings her legs up and inside, so she can slide down into the passenger seat with a whoomph and a flurry of petticoats. And then Harley's leaning forward, hand bracing her on Jack's knee, to press a slow kiss to his mouth.
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Jack leans into the kiss, always appreciative that his fashion-doll immobile mouth doesn't put her off any. When he pulls away he takes a minute to remind himself what bits of the car do what before heading out.
"I dunno if it's that week spent living that what-if native life, but I gotta say, driving one of these things doesn't feel as weird anymore. Driving in general, I...I dunno the last time I even drove myself before coming here. Never bothered when I was growing up planetside - where the fuck was there to drive to? - and then I was hopping from space station to corporate ship to colonized asteroid...I only ended up living on an actual planet for a little while in my adult life." And then he'd had people to drive for him, and a whole fleet of cars at his disposal. Touch of a button, bam there was a car.
So yeah, it's been a while, and probably not since he was living on Athenas and working at HQ. Lifetimes ago.
"But what kinda shitty caveman loser would I be if I was always making you drive?"